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Miscellaneous Jokes - Page 9

Here are more of our jokes and funny stories without a category of their own.

This is page 9 of 19. Showing jokes 81 to 90

Miscellaneous Jokes
An alien came to earth, step down from his space ship and said: "I come in peace". Then he gets out his gun and start shooting at everyone. One of the guys who is running away shouts to his friend: " I thought he said he comes in peace!". The alien says: "You mis-understood me, peace is the name of my space ship"
Miscellaneous Jokes
All the red Indians in the Reserve were starving. They ask the Witch Doctor to perform a Rain Dance, to see what the future held. The Witch Doctor dances about, mumbling and looking at the heavens above.
Suddenly he gives out a scream, and falls to the ground. What did you see, asked the Chief?
I had a vision, a hazy vision replied the Witch Doctor. Over many hills I saw a huge Bacon Tree, big enough to feed the whole tribe. What good is that says the Chief, if we leave the Reservation the Soldiers will follow and punish us. If we go at night, they will not know until it is too late replied the Witch Doctor. OK agrees the Chief and that night they sneaked out of camp.
They walked over hill upon hill, food and water were gone, and many died on this venture. Finally the Chief has had enough. How far is this Bacon Tree he asks. Just over one more hill is the reply. At last they climb the last hill, and start going down the other side. Suddenly there is the sound of the bugle charge, and Cavalry swoop down killing most of the Indians.
As the Chief lies dying, he crawls over to the dying Witch Doctor and gasps "What happened to your Bacon Tree" to which the Witch Doctor replies, "I was wrong it was a HAM BUSH."
Miscellaneous Jokes
'Hi Bob, Where have you been?'
'The cemetery.'
'Oh! Who's dead?'
'They all are.'
Miscellaneous Jokes
Dad, there's someone at the door collecting for the old folks home. Shall I give him grandma?
Miscellaneous Jokes
How do we know that Rome was built at night?
Because all the books say it wasn't built in a day!
Miscellaneous Jokes
There was 3 men on a plane, a Scotsman, an Irish man and a Chinese man. They was flying over Ireland and the Irish man said I see Ireland, and then they flew over Scotland and the Scotsman said I see Scotland. Then they was going through a storm and the Chinese man went to the cafeteria in the back and he dropped a plate on the floor and said I see china.
Submitted by: Sam
Miscellaneous Jokes
Don't worry if you're a kleptomaniac, you can always take something for it.
Miscellaneous Jokes
Time flies like an arrow, but fruit flies like a banana.
Miscellaneous Jokes
To err is human, to moo bovine.
Miscellaneous Jokes
You know it's going to be a bad day when you want to put on the clothes you wore home from the party and there aren't any.

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