Joke Topics

What did one cannibal say to another?"Who was that girl I saw you with last night?"
"That was no girl, that was my supper."

Did you hear about the paranoid with low self-esteem?
He thought that nobody important was out to get him.

Did you hear about the dog that ate nothing but garlic?
His bark was much worse than his bite.

Knock knock!
Who's there?
Watson.
Watson who?
Watson television tonight?

Waiter, waiter, there's a dead fly in my soup.
Yes, sir, it's the hot water that kills them.

What type of dogs are always welcome at football games?
Hot dogs.

What did one bee say to the other bee on a hot summers day?
Swarm today isn't it.

If voting changed anything, they'd make it illegal.

You know you're getting old when you turn out the lights for economic reasons instead of romantic ones.