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Miscellaneous Jokes - Page 7 - With 12 More Jokes and Funny Stories

Here are more of our jokes and funny stories without a category of their own.

This is page 7 of 23. Showing jokes 73 to 84

A train in India was going very, very slowly, and a group of American tourists were growing increasingly impatient. Finally, when it stopped for about the hundredth time, one of the tourists got out, walked to the front of the train, and asked the train driver, 'Can't you go any faster?'
'Oh, yes, sir' replied the driver, 'but I've not allowed to leave the train.'

A new porter at a Paris hotel was instructed by the manager that it was important to call the guests by their names in order to make them feel welcome and that the easiest way to find out their names was to look at their luggage. Armed with this advice, the porter took two guests up to their rooms, put down their bags and said, 'I hope you 'ave a very 'appy stay 'ere in Paris, Mr and Mrs Genuine Cow'ide.'

'Do you think what we're doing is wrong?'
'Of course it's wrong! It's illegal!'
'I've never done anything illegal before.'
'I thought you said you were an accountant!'

If bankers can count, how come they have eight windows and only four tellers?

Paranoids are people, too; they have their own problems.
It's easy to criticize, but if everybody hated you, you'd be paranoid too.

What does D.N.A. stand for?
The National Dyslexia Association

There were these two peanuts walking down the street, and one was assaulted.

Please, no deja vu. I don't want to go through that again.

A bird in the hand is safer than one overhead.

Quasimodo - that name rings a bell.

You're built upside down if your feet smell and your nose runs.

You can fool some of the people all of the time and all of the people some of the time, but you can make a fool of yourself anytime.

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