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Jokes About Doctors - 220 Jokes and Funny Stories To Laugh At
Want to laugh? Look no further! Our doctor jokes, and stories will crack you up. We've selected the funniest and most engaging content so you can relax and laugh. Our assortment offers cheeky one-liners and tales for everyone. There are 220 jokes in this category.
This is page 1 of 19. Showing jokes 1 to 12
'Doctor, I think I am a cat.'
' How long has this been going on?'
' Ever since I was a kitten.'
' How long has this been going on?'
' Ever since I was a kitten.'
'Doctor, I'm suffering from kleptomania.'
'Have you taken anything for it?'
' Yeah, anything I can lay my hands on.'
'Have you taken anything for it?'
' Yeah, anything I can lay my hands on.'
'No doubt about it. You're crazy.'
'I want a second opinion.'
'Okay, you're ugly, too.'
'I want a second opinion.'
'Okay, you're ugly, too.'
He's earned so much money as a doctor that he can occasionally tell a patient there's nothing wrong with him.
He's recovering from major surgery. The surgeon just separated him from his wallet.
I asked the doctor, 'What kind of shape am I in?'
'Let's put it this way,' said the doctor. 'From now on, I want you to pay me in advance.'
'Let's put it this way,' said the doctor. 'From now on, I want you to pay me in advance.'
I asked, 'Is this operation necessary?'
The surgeon said, 'Of course. I have a mortgage payment next week.'
The surgeon said, 'Of course. I have a mortgage payment next week.'
I don't have much faith in my doctor. All of his patients are sick.
My doctor said, 'Let me start with your medical history. Do you pay your doctor bills promptly?'
My doctor told me to take a hot bath before retiring. That's ridiculous. It'll be years before I retire.
Patient to doctor: 'I arrived early for an appointment, and you took me immediately. You spent time with me. I can read your prescription. Are you sure that you're a real doctor?'
The doctor said, 'Now, don't worry. We'll have you up and complaining about my bill soon.'