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Jokes About Doctors - Page 1


Here is our selection of jokes and funny stories about doctors. There are 139 jokes in this category.
jokes about doctors

This is page 1 of 14. Showing jokes 1 to 10

Jokes About Doctors
Patient: Doctor, I keep thinking that I'm a comedian.
Doctor: You must be joking.
Jokes About Doctors
Doctor, Doctor, I think I'm shrinking.
Doctor: Well, you'll just have to be a little patient.
Jokes About Doctors
Doctor, doctor, I keep thinking I'm a bottle of gin.
I think you need a little tonic.
Jokes About Doctors
Patient: Doctor, doctor, I have a hoarse throat.
Doctor: Believe me, the resemblance doesn't end there.
Submitted by: Brian
Jokes About Doctors
This woman went to the doctor. She said, 'Doctor, my husband thinks he's a cat.'
The doctor said, 'How do you know that?'
She said, 'Well every night, when I go to bed, there's this horrible howling outside the window.'
The doctor said, 'Yes, but are you sure that that's your husband?'
She said, 'Well a cat wouldn't use language like that.'
Jokes About Doctors
Doctor, doctor, I think I've been bitten by a vampire.
Drink this glass of water.
Will it make me better?
No, but I'll be able to see if your neck leaks.
Jokes About Doctors
Doctor, Doctor, I keep thinking that I'm a bee.
Doctor: Sorry, I'm too busy to see you right now. Can you give me a buzz later?
Jokes About Doctors
The newly-qualified doctor was thrilled to be allowed to accompany the famous surgeon on his daily hospital rounds. He answered enthusiastically whenever his opinion was asked for; completely undaunted by the fact that his diagnoses were consistently wrong. In desperation, the surgeon took him aside and asked him: "Have you ever considered becoming an economist?"
Jokes About Doctors
How do you get your revenge on a doctor?
Give him a taste of his own medicine.
Jokes About Doctors
Billy: I went to the eye doctor because I was seeing spots in front of my eyes. He gave me glasses.
Paul: Did the glasses help?
Billy: They did, I can see the spots much more clearly now.

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