Why did the arrows shake?
Because they were all in a quiver.
Why did the woman have her hair in a bun?
Because she had her nose in a cheeseburger.
Why did the crab blush?
Because of the seaweed!
Why did the sailor grab a piece of soap when his ship was sinking?
So he could wash himself ashore.
Why did Captain Kirk's chicken cross the road?
To boldly go where no chicken has gone before.
Why did the egg set off on a voyage around the world?
Because it was an eggsplorer.
Why did the fish cross the road?
To get to the other tide.
Why did the hamburger cross the road?
To ketchup with the French fries.
Why did the hospital send the trainee nurse to art college?
To learn how to draw blood.
Why did the man throw his wristwatch out of the window?
He wanted to see time fly.
Why did the man with one hand cross the road?
To get to the second-hand shop.
Why did the pirate's phone keep going beep, beep, beep?
Because he had left it off his hook.