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Jokes About Computers - Page 4 - With 12 More Jokes and Funny Stories
Here are more of our jokes and funny stories about computer programmers and users.
This is page 4 of 9. Showing jokes 37 to 48
Errors have occurred.
We won't tell you where or why.
Lazy programmers.
We won't tell you where or why.
Lazy programmers.
Chaos reigns within.
Reflect, repent, and reboot.
Order shall return.
Reflect, repent, and reboot.
Order shall return.
Login incorrect.
Only perfect spellers may enter this system.
Only perfect spellers may enter this system.
Printer not ready.
Could be a fatal error.
Have you a pen?
Could be a fatal error.
Have you a pen?
A truck driver hauling a tractor-trailer load of computers stops for a beer. As he approaches the bar, he sees a big sign on the door saying:
' NERDS NOT ALLOWED -- ENTER AT YOUR OWN RISK'
He goes in and sits down.
The bartender comes over to him, sniffs, says he smells kind of nerdy and asks him what he does for a living. The truck driver says he drives a truck, and the smell is just from the computers he is hauling. The bartender says OK, truck drivers are not nerds, and serves him a beer.
As he is sipping his beer, a skinny guy walks in with tape around his glasses, a pocket protector with twelve kinds of pens and pencils stashed in his pocket protector, and a belt at least a foot too long.
The bartender, without saying a word, pulls out a shotgun and blows the guy away.
The truck driver asks him why he did that. The bartender said not to worry; the nerds are overpopulating Silicon Valley and are in season now. You don't even need a license, he said.
So the truck driver finishes his beer, gets back in his truck, and heads back onto the freeway. Suddenly, he veers to avoid an accident and the load shifts. The back door breaks open, and computers spill out all over the freeway. He jumps out and sees a crowd already forming, grabbing up the computers. They are all engineers, accountants, and programmers wearing the nerdiest clothes he has ever seen. He can't let them steal his whole load. So, remembering what happened in the bar, he pulls out his gun and starts blasting away, felling several of them instantly.
A highway patrol officer comes zooming up and jumps out of the car, screaming at him to stop. The truck driver said, 'What's wrong? I thought nerds were in season.'
' Well, sure,' said the patrolman, 'But you can't bait 'em.'
' NERDS NOT ALLOWED -- ENTER AT YOUR OWN RISK'
He goes in and sits down.
The bartender comes over to him, sniffs, says he smells kind of nerdy and asks him what he does for a living. The truck driver says he drives a truck, and the smell is just from the computers he is hauling. The bartender says OK, truck drivers are not nerds, and serves him a beer.
As he is sipping his beer, a skinny guy walks in with tape around his glasses, a pocket protector with twelve kinds of pens and pencils stashed in his pocket protector, and a belt at least a foot too long.
The bartender, without saying a word, pulls out a shotgun and blows the guy away.
The truck driver asks him why he did that. The bartender said not to worry; the nerds are overpopulating Silicon Valley and are in season now. You don't even need a license, he said.
So the truck driver finishes his beer, gets back in his truck, and heads back onto the freeway. Suddenly, he veers to avoid an accident and the load shifts. The back door breaks open, and computers spill out all over the freeway. He jumps out and sees a crowd already forming, grabbing up the computers. They are all engineers, accountants, and programmers wearing the nerdiest clothes he has ever seen. He can't let them steal his whole load. So, remembering what happened in the bar, he pulls out his gun and starts blasting away, felling several of them instantly.
A highway patrol officer comes zooming up and jumps out of the car, screaming at him to stop. The truck driver said, 'What's wrong? I thought nerds were in season.'
' Well, sure,' said the patrolman, 'But you can't bait 'em.'
An elephant is a mouse with an operating system.
If the auto industry had done what the computer industry has done in the past 30 years, a Rolls Royce would cost $2.50 and would get 2,000,000 miles per gallon.
Assumed Decimal Point: Located two positions to the right of a programmer's current salary in estimating his own worth.
'Virtual' means never knowing where your next byte is coming from.
The world is coming to an end. Please log off.
The reason computer chips are so small is computers don't eat much.
Real Users never use the Help key.