Home / Jokes About Work / Jokes About Work - Page 2
Jokes About Work - Page 2
Here are more jokes about employment and work.
This is page 2 of 4. Showing jokes 11 to 20
If at first you don't succeed, try management.
How You Know You Are A High Tech Worker
It's dark when you drive to and from work.
You see a good looking person and know it is a visitor.
You have sat at the same desk for 4 years and worked for three different companies.
Your resume is on a flash drive in your pocket.
You learn about your layoff on CNN.
Your biggest loss from a system crash is that you lose your best jokes.
Your supervisor hasn't the ability to do your job assignment.
You sit in a cubicle smaller than your bedroom closet.
Salaries of the members on the Executive Board are higher than all the Third World countries' annual budgets combined.
Weekends are those days your spouse makes you stay home.
Being sick is defined as can't walk or you're in the hospital.
All real work gets started after 5pm or on weekends.
Only 10% of the people you work with (your boss included) - know what they are doing.
Vacation is something you rollover to next year.
Your relatives and family describe your job as "works with computers" or "does something with satellites."
You have read this entire list and understood it.
It's dark when you drive to and from work.
You see a good looking person and know it is a visitor.
You have sat at the same desk for 4 years and worked for three different companies.
Your resume is on a flash drive in your pocket.
You learn about your layoff on CNN.
Your biggest loss from a system crash is that you lose your best jokes.
Your supervisor hasn't the ability to do your job assignment.
You sit in a cubicle smaller than your bedroom closet.
Salaries of the members on the Executive Board are higher than all the Third World countries' annual budgets combined.
Weekends are those days your spouse makes you stay home.
Being sick is defined as can't walk or you're in the hospital.
All real work gets started after 5pm or on weekends.
Only 10% of the people you work with (your boss included) - know what they are doing.
Vacation is something you rollover to next year.
Your relatives and family describe your job as "works with computers" or "does something with satellites."
You have read this entire list and understood it.
When I first started working, I used to dream of the day when I might be earning the salary I'm starving on now.
Interviewer: "In this job, we need someone who is responsible."
Job Applicant: "That's me. In my last job, whenever anything went wrong, they said I was responsible."
Job Applicant: "That's me. In my last job, whenever anything went wrong, they said I was responsible."
I left my last job because I was told to do something I didn't like.
Really! What was that?
The boss told me to look for another job.
Really! What was that?
The boss told me to look for another job.
The owner of a large warehouse decided to make a surprise visit to check up on his staff. While walking through the warehouse, he spotted a young man sitting lazily in a corner.
"How much are you being paid a week?" said the owner angrily.
"Three hundred bucks," replied the young man.
Taking out a fold of bills from his wallet, the owner slapped the money into the boy's hand and said, "Here's a week's pay. Now get out and don't come back here again."
Turning to one of the supervisors, he said, "How long has that lazy guy worked here, anyway?"
"He doesn't work here," said the supervisor.
"He just came to deliver a pizza."
"How much are you being paid a week?" said the owner angrily.
"Three hundred bucks," replied the young man.
Taking out a fold of bills from his wallet, the owner slapped the money into the boy's hand and said, "Here's a week's pay. Now get out and don't come back here again."
Turning to one of the supervisors, he said, "How long has that lazy guy worked here, anyway?"
"He doesn't work here," said the supervisor.
"He just came to deliver a pizza."
Billy: Why did you quit your job at the toffee
factory?
Joe: I bit off more than I could chew.
Joe: I bit off more than I could chew.
Before deciding to retire from working, it is best to stay home for a week and watch daytime TV shows.
A good executive is a man who is happy to share the credit with the person who did all the work.
If work is so terrific, why do they have to pay you to do it?