Office Humor - Page 1

In any office you can always tell who the boss is. He's the one who watches the clock during your coffee break.

It's no use asking me. I was hired for my looks.

Boss: If Mr. White comes into the office today, tell him I'm out.
Secretary: Yes, sir, anything else?
Boss: Yes. And try not look too busy when he shows up or he'll know you're lying.

"I'll never forget the time they gave me a farewell party at work. I was so surprised, I didn't even know I had been fired."

A boss shows one of his staff his brand new sports car. "That is an amazing car," the employee responds.
"Isn’t it?" replies the boss. "But if you can set your goals higher and work even harder this year, then I can get a much more expensive car next year."

The worst thing about office parties is having to spend the day after looking for a new job.

It is really difficult to soar with the eagles when you have to work with an office full of turkeys.

If you have nothing to do, please don't do it here.

When you take a stand about something, you're just being stubborn.
When your boss does it, he's being firm.

A journey of a thousand miles begins with a cash advance.