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Jokes About Doctors - Page 18 - With 12 More Jokes and Funny Stories
Here are more of our jokes and funny stories about doctors.
This is page 18 of 19. Showing jokes 205 to 216
Patient: Doctor, I feel like I've become an electric eel.
Doctor: That's shocking.
Doctor: That's shocking.
Doctor, doctor, I think I'm a witch.
Well, you'd better lie down for a spell.
Well, you'd better lie down for a spell.
Doctor, doctor, I feel really funny.
Well, why don't you tell me a joke, I could do with a laugh.
Well, why don't you tell me a joke, I could do with a laugh.
Doctor: What seems to be the problem?
Patient: I can't stop myself eating dates.
Doctor: That's not really a problem.
Patient: Yes it is, I've run out of calendars.
Patient: I can't stop myself eating dates.
Doctor: That's not really a problem.
Patient: Yes it is, I've run out of calendars.
Doctor: What seems to be the trouble?
Patient: Last week I swallowed a clock.
Doctor: Why didn't come to see me at once?
Patient: I didn't want to alarm anyone.
Patient: Last week I swallowed a clock.
Doctor: Why didn't come to see me at once?
Patient: I didn't want to alarm anyone.
Doctor, doctor, my wife keeps thinking that she is a piano.
How does she feel?
Grand.
How does she feel?
Grand.
Patient: Doctor, if I take these pills will I get better?
Doctor: Well, nobody I have given them to has ever come back.
Doctor: Well, nobody I have given them to has ever come back.
Doctor: I'm afraid I've got some bad news and I've got some really bad news.
Patient: Give me the bad news first.
Doctor: Well, you only have about twenty-four hours to live I'm afraid.
Patient: That's terrible, so what's the really bad news?
Doctor: I've been trying to reach you since yesterday.
Patient: Give me the bad news first.
Doctor: Well, you only have about twenty-four hours to live I'm afraid.
Patient: That's terrible, so what's the really bad news?
Doctor: I've been trying to reach you since yesterday.
Patient: Doctor, doctor, I just can't stop eating cheese and biscuits.
Doctor: You must be crackers.
Doctor: You must be crackers.
Patient: Doctor, I have trouble getting to sleep.
Doctor: Well try sitting on the edge of the bed and you'll soon drop off.
Doctor: Well try sitting on the edge of the bed and you'll soon drop off.
Patient: Doctor, doctor. You've got to help me! My hands just won't stop shaking.
Doctor: Do you drink a lot of coffee?
Patient: No, I don't drink very much, I spill most of it.
Doctor: Do you drink a lot of coffee?
Patient: No, I don't drink very much, I spill most of it.
Doctor, doctor, I keep thinking that I'm a pig.
Don't worry, I will soon cure you.
Don't worry, I will soon cure you.