A condo committee was screening a couple interested in renting an apartment:
'What kind of work do you do?' they were asked. 'My husband is an engineer, and I'm a schoolteacher,' the wife replied.
'Any children?' asked a committee member.
'Yes, 7 & 8 years old,' the wife replied.
'Animals?' asked another committee member.
'Oh no! They're very well-behaved!'
Arnold saw an advertisement for a handyman for an apartment complex and decided to apply for the job.
'What do you know about plumbing was the interviewer's first question.
'Nothing at all,' said George.
'Well what about electricity?'
'Not a thing.'
'How about gardening then?'
'Never cut a lawn in my life.'
'Then tell me,' said the confused interviewer, 'just what makes you so handy?'
'I live right around the corner,' said Arnold.
How does a spoiled rich girl change a light bulb?
She says, 'Daddy, I want a new apartment.'
I used to invite this gal to my apartment to help me make hamburgers.
I called her my grille friend!
Mary was telling her friends about her new apartment. 'It's fantastic,' she said, 'I can lie in bed and watch the sunrise.'
'So what,' replied her friend, Joan, 'in my apartment, I can sit on a chair and watch the kitchen sink.'
Nan: How do you like your new studio apartment?
Dan: I have no room for complaint.
Why are they called apartments when they're all stuck together?