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Funny Definitions - Page 2

Here are more of our funny definitions.

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Funny Definitions
Impeccable: having immunity to woodpeckers.
Funny Definitions
Diplomacy is the art of saying "nice doggy" until you can find a rock.
Funny Definitions
A consultant is a person who borrows your watch, tells you what time it is, pockets the watch, and sends you a bill for it.
Funny Definitions
A born loser: Somebody who calls the telephone number that's scrawled in lipstick on the phone booth wall -- and his wife answers.

Here are some randomly selected jokes from other categories

You're red shirt goes well with your eyes...


When I first started working, I used to dream of the day when I might be earning the salary I'm starving on now.


Why was the vampire sent to jail?
He tried to rob the local blood bank!

If you can read this bumper sticker, you are in range.

Knock, knock. Who's there?
Termite who?
Termite's the night!


Lawyers are people who can write a ten thousand word document and call it a brief.

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