Categories | Topics | Newest | Search

Home / Joke Topics Index / Joke Topics - O / Joke Topic - Onions - 1

Joke Topic - 'Onions' - 4 Jokes and Funny Stories To Laugh At


Here are 4 jokes on the topic - 'Onions'.

How do you start an onion race?
'Onion marks! Get set! Go!
Janet: I call my new boyfriend onion.
Jane: Why?
Janet: Sometimes he makes me want to cry.
What dog smells of onions?
A hot dog.
What's the difference between a lawyer and an onion?
No one cries when you slice up a lawyer.

Here are some randomly selected joke topics

Dieting

Why did the lizard decide to go on a diet?
Because it weighed too much for its scales.

Reality

Do not adjust your mind
- there is a fault in reality

Doctors

Doctor, Doctor, I've got rotten teeth, bad breath, and smelly feet.
Sounds like you've got Foot and Mouth disease!

Doctors

Doctor: The best time to take a bath is just before you retire.
Patient: You mean I don't need to take another bath until I'm sixty-five?

Books

How many books can you put on an empty shelf?
One. After that, it isn't empty.

Dogs

What breed of dog is always tired when it is in London?
An English sleep dog.

Candles

What did the big candle say to the little candle?
You're pretty bright for such a little guy!

Cold

Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Lettuce.
Lettuce in it's cold out here.

Fat

Yo momma is so fat she can sit on a dollar and make change.
© 2004 - 2025 Janim.net All Rights Reserved