Joke Topic - 'Everything' - 2 Jokes and Funny Stories To Laugh At

Here are 2 jokes on the topic - 'Everything'.

Go ahead, tell them everything you know. It'll only take 10 seconds.

What do you give someone who has everything?
A burglar alarm.

Here are some randomly selected joke topics

What did Adam say on December 24th?
It's Christmas, Eve.

The statesman shears the sheep; the politician skins them.

Doctor, Doctor, I feel like a deck of cards.
Sit down, and I'll deal with you later.

I don't care who you are, what you are driving, or where you would rather be

Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Dishes.
Dishes who?
Dishes the way I talk now that I've got false teeth.

I'm not a complete idiot; some parts are missing!

I don't eat snails - I only eat fast food.

Did you hear about the man who opened a flea circus?
He started it from scratch.

Just how deep into the water can a frog go?
Knee-deep.