What do you get if you cross a labrador dog with a tortoise?
You get an animal that goes to the newsagents and comes back with last week's newspaper.
What do you get if you cross a thief with an orchestra?
Robbery with violins.
What do you get if you cross Sir Lancelot and Dracula?
A bite in shining armour.
What do you get if you cross a worm with an elephant?
Great big holes in your garden.
What do you get if you cross a snake with a set of building blocks?
A boa constructor.
What do you get if you cross a palm tree with a frog?
A croakanut.
What do you get if you cross a sheep and a rainstorm?
A wet blanket.
What do you get if you cross a hen with some gunpowder?
An eggsplosion.
What do you get if you cross a traffic warden with a dog?
A barking ticket.
What do you get if you cross a pig with Count Dracula?
A hampire.
What do you get if you cross a vegetable with a 26 mile run?
A marrowthon.
What do you get if you cross a tourist and an elephant?
Something that carries its own trunk.