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Scottish Jokes and Humour - Page 9


Here is more of our humorous Scottish jokes and funny stories about Scotland and the Scots.

This is page 9 of 9. Showing jokes 81 to 83

Scottish Jokes and Humour
A Scotsman was on a fishing trip in the northwoods of Canada. "What's that over yonder'?" the Scotsman asked of his guide.
"That's a moose, eh," said the guide.
"Aye!" exclaimed the Scotsman, with raised eyebrow. "If that be a moose, I'd be sure an to hate to see your rats!"
Scottish Jokes and Humour
A Scot from Aberdeen was on holiday in London and every night he returned to his hotel full of the wonders of the city. So much so that another guest asked: 'Is this your first visit?'
'Aye, it is.'
'You seem to be having a great time.'
'Aye, I am that.'
'Good.'
'And what's more, it's not just a holiday. It's my honeymoon as well.'
'Oh. Then where's your wife?'
'Och. She's been here before.'
Scottish Jokes and Humour
Hear about the skeleton that wore a kilt? It was Boney Prince Charlie.


Here are some randomly selected jokes from other categories

Puppies

A man walked into a pet shop and said, 'I'd like a puppy for my son.'
'Sorry sir,' said the store owner, 'we don't do part exchange.'

Repeat Offenders

Stop repeat offenders. Don't re-elect them!

Married

Some women get even with their husbands by staying married to them.

Ghosts

Why do ghost like to go shopping when the stores are having sales?
Because they like to go bargain haunting.

Sherlock Holmes

Did you hear about the detective who became famous after solving crimes by pure chance?
He was called Sheer - Luck Holmes.

Flies

What do you call a fly that has no wings?
A walk.

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