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The Most Recently Added Jokes and Funny Stories - Page 2
This is page 2 of the most recently added jokes and funny stories. We hope that you will laugh at them.
Scottish Jokes
Red Adair, the Texan oil-fire fighter, walked into a bar in Aberdeen one evening. The man next to him at the bar immediately spotted him as an American. "I've been to the States myself," he said.
"Oh, really," said the Texan, in a tired voice.
"Oh, yes, I was in California a whole month. I went to a concert starring a famous country singer called Benny Rogers, and ..."
"Would that be Kenny Rogers?"
"Oh, yes. That's right. And he sang with a woman with a fine figure, Polly Darton."
"Do you mean Dolly Parton?" The American's voice was terse, and the man decided it was time to change the subject.
"Haven't I seen you on the TV?" he asked.
"Maybe. I'm Red Adair."
"What! Red Adair?
I must have your autograph. And are you still married to Ginger Rogers?"
"Oh, really," said the Texan, in a tired voice.
"Oh, yes, I was in California a whole month. I went to a concert starring a famous country singer called Benny Rogers, and ..."
"Would that be Kenny Rogers?"
"Oh, yes. That's right. And he sang with a woman with a fine figure, Polly Darton."
"Do you mean Dolly Parton?" The American's voice was terse, and the man decided it was time to change the subject.
"Haven't I seen you on the TV?" he asked.
"Maybe. I'm Red Adair."
"What! Red Adair?
I must have your autograph. And are you still married to Ginger Rogers?"
What Do You Get? Jokes
What do you get when you cross a kangaroo with a mink. A fur coat with pockets.
Jokes About Elephants
Did you hear that the elephants at the circus are going on strike?
They're tired of working for peanuts.
They're tired of working for peanuts.
Jokes About Lawyers
How do you get a group of lawyers to smile for a photograph?
Just say "Fees!"
Just say "Fees!"
Jokes About Idiots
What did the idiot say when she saw the sign in front of the YMCA?
Look! They spelled MACY'S wrong!"
Look! They spelled MACY'S wrong!"
Jokes About Idiots
Did you hear about the idiot who tried to kill himself?
He jumped out a basement window.
He jumped out a basement window.
Funny Insults
I would ask you how old you are but I know you can't count that high.
Jokes About Idiots
Did you hear about the idiot who was given a pair of water skis?
He spend the rest of his life looking for a sloping lake.
He spend the rest of his life looking for a sloping lake.
Jokes About Idiots
Two idiots each bought a horse at a horse sale. Both horses were similar so Brian said to Joe: "How shall we tell the horses apart?"
"I tell you what," said Joe. "We'll bob the tail of one of them."
But by mistake both the tails got bobbed so that they still had the same problem.
"Oh I know what we'll do," said Brian. "You take the black one and I'll have the white one!"
"I tell you what," said Joe. "We'll bob the tail of one of them."
But by mistake both the tails got bobbed so that they still had the same problem.
"Oh I know what we'll do," said Brian. "You take the black one and I'll have the white one!"
Jokes About Idiots
How can you tell if there is an idiot on an oil rig?
He's the one throwing bread to the helicopters.
He's the one throwing bread to the helicopters.
Jokes About Psychiatrists
Psychiatrist: So what's your problem?
Patient: I prefer patterned socks to plain socks.
Psychiatrist: There's nothing wrong with that. Lots of people prefer patterned socks to plain socks. I do myself.
Patient: So how do you like yours - fried or boiled?
Patient: I prefer patterned socks to plain socks.
Psychiatrist: There's nothing wrong with that. Lots of people prefer patterned socks to plain socks. I do myself.
Patient: So how do you like yours - fried or boiled?
What Do You Get? Jokes
What do you get if you cross a freeway with a skateboard?
Run over.
Run over.