My kid shows signs of becoming an executive. Already he takes two hours for lunch.
No problem is so formidable that you can't just walk away from it.
Nothing is so embarrassing as watching your boss do something you told him couldn't be done.
The best way to get into trouble is to be right at the wrong time.
The man who doesn't laugh at a funny joke is probably not employed by the man who told it.
The nicest thing about dictating a letter is that you can use words you don't know how to spell.
Manager: What do you mean by telling me that you have had seven years experience in a bank when
you never even had a job before?
Applicant: Well, you did advertise for a man with imagination.
I'd follow him anywhere … but only because he's so funny to watch.
Ah, indecision — or, as they like to call it, managerial flexibility.
If you are not fired with enthusiasm, you'll be fired with enthusiasm!
Why is it the boss is always in early when you're late, and late when you're early?
I thought I wanted a career, but it turns out I just wanted pay checks.