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Jokes For Children - 9

Here are more of our jokes and funny stories for children.

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Jokes For Children
I used to hate my brother when we were kids. One year my mum said, 'Do you know it's his birthday tomorrow?'
I said, 'Thanks for telling me I'll give him my whooping cough.'
Jokes For Children
The other day my dad leapt eight feet in the air. I said, 'Dad, I didn't know you were a high-jumper.'
He said, 'I'm not. Your mum dropped the iron on my foot.'
Jokes For Children
This vicar said, 'I like graveyards. They're never deserted.'
The sexton said, 'Really Father, why's that?'
The vicar said, 'Well there's always some body there.'
Jokes For Children
This antique dealer was trying to sell a man a skull. He said, 'It's Oliver Cromwell's skull you know.'
The man said, 'It can't be, it's not big enough.'
The dealer said, 'It's Cromwell's skull when he was a little boy.'
Jokes For Children
There were these two eggs in the monastery frying pan. One said to the other, 'You know something? Any minute now it's going to be out of the frying pan into the friar.'
Jokes For Children
My brother was banging his. head on a brick wall. I said, 'What're you doing that for?'
He said, 'Because it's a lovely feeling when I stop.'
Jokes For Children
My sister went to first aid lessons. They said, 'What's the first thing you'd do if a man was blown up by dynamite?'
My sister said, 'Wait for him to come down.'
Jokes For Children
My brother came running in He said, 'Mum, there's a man outside with a broken arm called Brian.'
My mum said, 'That's a funny name for a broken arm.'
Jokes For Children
This bloke said to my brother, 'I think I'm a clock you know.'
My brother said, 'Well don't get wound up about it.'
Jokes For Children
This bloke said to my brother, 'My trouble is I keep thinking I'm a strawberry.'
My brother said, 'You're in a jam then aren't you.'

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