I was married for five years and never told anybody. I like to keep my troubles to myself.
Many a woman marries a man for life and then finds out he doesn't have any.
She could have married any man she pleased. The trouble was that she never pleased anyone.
She didn't want to marry him for his money, but it was the only way she could get it.
We're equal partners in our marriage. I'm the silent one.
We've been married for ten years and had only one quarrel. It started on our wedding day and hasn't ended yet!
'Did you see some ruins while you were in England?'
'Sure I did. And one of them wanted to marry me.'
'What did you have for breakfast this morning?'
'Oh, the usual argument.'
'Would you buy a letter opener?'
'Buy one? I married one!'
A woman marries to make two people happy: herself and her mother.
Isn't marriage wonderful? To be able to sit in your own home, relax, drink beer, and watch your wife's favorite programs all night.
It's a give-and-take marriage. He gives, and she takes.