Home / Jokes About Lawyers - Page 1

Jokes About Lawyers - Page 1


Here is our selection of jokes and funny stories about lawyers and the legal profession. There are 87 jokes in this category.

This is page 1 of 9. Showing jokes 1 to 10

Jokes About Lawyers
He is no lawyer who cannot take two sides.
Jokes About Lawyers
The lawyer said to his client. "Well. if you really want me to give you my honest opinion—“
"I don't.” said the client. "I want your professional advice."
Jokes About Lawyers
Many years ago, a junior partner in a law firm was sent to a far-away state to represent a long-term client accused of robbery. After days of trial, the case was won, the client acquitted and released. Excited about his success, the attorney telegraphed the firm: "Justice prevailed."
The senior partner replied in haste: "Appeal immediately."
Jokes About Lawyers
Lawyers don't give bad advice - they charge for it.
Jokes About Lawyers
It was so cold last week that I saw several lawyers with their hands in their own pockets.
Jokes About Lawyers
Talk is cheap until you hire a lawyer.
Jokes About Lawyers
An old man was on his death bed. He wanted badly to take all his money with him. He called his priest, his doctor and his lawyer to his bedside. "Here's $30,000 cash to be held by each of you. I trust you to put this in my coffin when I die so I can take all my money with me."
At the funeral, each man put an envelope in the coffin. Riding away in a limousine, the priest suddenly broke into tears and confessed that he had only put $20,000 into the envelope because he needed $10,000 for a new baptistery.
"Well, since we're confiding in each other," said the doctor, "I only put $10,000 in the envelope because we needed a new machine at the hospital which cost $20,000."
The lawyer was aghast. "I'm ashamed of both of you," he exclaimed. "I want it known that when I put my envelope in that coffin, it held my personal check for the full $30,000."
Jokes About Lawyers
Lawyers are people who can write a ten thousand word document and call it a brief.
Jokes About Lawyers
What do you call an honest lawyer?
Hypothetical.
Submitted by: William
Jokes About Lawyers
Where can you find a good lawyer?
In the graveyard.
Submitted by: William

You are currently on page 1 of 9

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 Next