Jokes About Idiots - Page 1

One time an idiot was at a vending machine. He would stick a quarter in, push the button, a soda would come out and he would put it on top of the machine. He did this a few more times before a man asked why he kept doing this, and he said, "Because I'm winning."

A decorator was painting a house and the owner came home to find the man rushing about like a mad thing with his brushes.
'Why are you working so fast?' he asked.
'Well, you see, sir, the paint's running low and I want to finish the job before it's all gone.'

An idiot was given the job of painting white lines down the middle of a road. On his first day he painted eight miles, on his second day he painted 3 miles, and on his third day he painted just one mile. The boss was not pleased. He asked him, "Why is it that you are painting less each day?"
"Because each day I get further away from the can of paint."