Jokes About Fishing - 11 Jokes and Funny Stories To Laugh At

A good friend of mine, living in northern Michigan, decided to go ice fishing. He gathered up all of his tackle and moved out on the ice. He started to auger a hole in the ice when he heard a voice boom out from above:
'There are no fish here!' He thought for a few moments, gathered up his stuff, then moved a little farther down the ice. He started to auger a new hole in the ice when he heard the voice boom out from above:
'There are no fish here!'
So, he gathered up his stuff again, moved a little farther down the ice, then started to auger another hole in the ice. Again, he heard the voice boom out from above:
' I said there are no fish here!!!'
He sheepishly asked: 'Is that you, god?'
To which the booming voice replied:
' No, I'm the rink manager.'

As a priest walked along the cliffs at Dover, he saw two locals using a rope to pull another man ashore.
'That's what I like to see', said the priest, 'A man helping his fellow man'.
As he walked away, one local said to another, 'Well, the priest sure doesn't know the first thing about shark fishing.'

'I went fly-fishing yesterday.'
'Did you catch anything?'
'Yes, a bluebottle.'

Two fishermen were out in their boat one day when a hand appeared out of the water.
'What's that?' asked the first fisherman. 'It looks like someone's drowning.'
' Nonsense,' said the second. 'It was just a little wave.'

Do you like fly fishing?
No, I prefer to catch fish.

When librarians go fishing, what do they use for bait?
Bookworms!

What do you call a man who likes to go fishing every weekend?
Rod!

'How did you come to fall into the water?'
'I didn't come to fall into the water. I came to fish.'

John had been fishing all day without any luck. On his way home, he went to the fish market and asked the clerk, "Mister, can you just stand there and throw me several of your biggest bass."
The clerk was puzzled. "Throw them at you sir?
What's the idea?"
John replied, "I may be a bad fisherman, but I'm not a liar. I want to be able to tell my wife that I caught them."

It was a cold winter day, when an old man walked out onto a frozen lake, cut a hole in the ice, dropped in his fishing line and began waiting for a fish to bite. He was there for almost an hour without even a nibble when a young boy walked out onto the ice, cut a hole in the ice not too far from the old man and dropped in his fishing line. It only took about a minute and WHAM! a Largemouth Bass hit his hook and the boy pulled in the fish. The old man couldn't believe it but figured it was just luck. But, the boy dropped in his line and again within just a few minutes pulled in another one. This went on and on until finally the old man couldn't take it any more since he hadn't caught a thing all this time. He went to the boy and said, "Son, I've been here for over an hour without even a nibble. You have been here only a few minutes and have caught about half a dozen fish! How do you do it?"
The boy responded, "Roo raf roo reep ra rums rrarm."
"What was that?" the old man asked.
Again the boy responded, "Roo raf roo reep ra rums rarrm."
"Look," said the old man, "I can't understand a word you are saying."
So, the boy spat into his hand and said, "You have to keep the worms warm!"

Did you hear what Noah told his son when they went fishing?
"You need to be careful with the bait as we only have two worms."