Jokes About Education - Page 1

A couple send their dim son to a special tutor to help him catch up on his schoolwork. After a month they ask the tutor for a progress report.
"He's doing straight 'A's now" says the tutor.
"That's fantastic" say the parents.
"Yes, they're great." says the tutor. "But his 'B's are still a little bit squint."

Did you hear about the high class private school where all the pupils were very smelly?
Only filthy rich kids were allowed to go there.

l thought I might become a history teacher when I grew up, but then I realized there was no future in it.

Bill: So your son is at college. . . what's he going to be when he gets through?
Father: A pensioner.

I went to high school so long that the other students brought me apples . . . they thought I was the teacher.

Son: My teacher must be really old.
Father: Why is that son?
Son: Well, today in class, he told us that he used to teach Shakespeare.

Who do you call the two people who cause the most embarrassment at the annual school parents' evening?
Mum and dad.

Welcome to our school, William," said the nursery school teacher to the new boy. "How old are you?"
"I'm not old," said Simon. "I'm still almost new.

They call him toe nails because he is always at the foot of the class.

In college I'm studying Pharmacy - because I've always wanted to be a farmer.