Home / Jokes About Doctors / Jokes About Doctors - Page 12
Jokes About Doctors - Page 12 - With 12 More Jokes and Funny Stories
Here are more of our jokes and funny stories about doctors.
This is page 12 of 19. Showing jokes 133 to 144
Husband: Doc, can you examine my wife? I think her mind is finally gone!
Doctor: Why do you think that?
Husband: It must be; she's been giving me a piece of it every day for the last 18 years!
Doctor: Why do you think that?
Husband: It must be; she's been giving me a piece of it every day for the last 18 years!
The doctor checked the patient's purse before deciding that there was no hope.
Patient: I want you to tell me the truth, doctor. Am I going to get better?
Doctor: Why, of course, you are. You'll get better even if it costs every penny you have.
Doctor: Why, of course, you are. You'll get better even if it costs every penny you have.
Patient: Doctor, doctor. I keep thinking I'm a comedian.
Doctor: You must be joking.
Doctor: You must be joking.
Patient: Doctor, I think that I'm a cup of coffee.
Doctor: Do perk up, and don't be such a drip.
Doctor: Do perk up, and don't be such a drip.
Patient: Doctor, my stomach really hurts!
Doctor: Oh, stop bellyaching, will you!
Doctor: Oh, stop bellyaching, will you!
Patient: Doctor, will you treat me?
Doctor: Definitely not! You'll have to pay just like every other patient.
Doctor: Definitely not! You'll have to pay just like every other patient.
Patient: Doctor, I feel like a window.
Doctor: Tell me where the pane is.
Doctor: Tell me where the pane is.
Patient: I have a splinter in my finger.
Doctor: Well, that's what you get for scratching your head.
Doctor: Well, that's what you get for scratching your head.
Patient: Doctor, what is the best thing to do when you hear ringing in your ear?
Doctor: Answer it.
Doctor: Answer it.
Patient: Doctor, I'm feeling really nervous! This is the first I've had an operation.
Doctor: I know just how you feel. You're my first patient!
Doctor: I know just how you feel. You're my first patient!
Patient: Please help me, Doctor. Whenever I look at my dog, I keep seeing spots in front of my eyes.
Doctor: Relax. Your dog is a Dalmatian.
Doctor: Relax. Your dog is a Dalmatian.