Home / Jokes About Christmas - Page 1
Jokes About Christmas - Page 1
Here is our collection of jokes and funny stories about christmas or xmas as it is often called. There are 140 jokes in this category.
This is page 1 of 14. Showing jokes 1 to 10
What do witches sing at Christmas?
"Deck the Halls with Poison Ivy."
"Deck the Halls with Poison Ivy."
What happens if you eat Christmas decorations?
You get tinselitis.
You get tinselitis.
Did you hear what happened to the man who decked the halls?
He was charged with assault.
He was charged with assault.
Where does Father Christmas stay when he takes a vacation?
In a ho ho hotel.
In a ho ho hotel.
Why did Santa get a parking ticket?
He parked in a snow parking zone.
He parked in a snow parking zone.
What do you get if you cross a pig with a Christmas tree?
A pork-u-pine.
A pork-u-pine.
What make of motorbike does Father Christmas ride around on?
A Holly Davidson!
A Holly Davidson!
How do you know that Santa is good at karate?
Because he has a black belt!
Because he has a black belt!
Why must Santa Claus be a man?
Because no woman is going to be seen wearing the same outfit year after year!
Because no woman is going to be seen wearing the same outfit year after year!
Joe bought his wife a beautiful diamond ring for Christmas.
After hearing about this rather extravagant gift, a friend of his said, "I thought she wanted a Mercedes sports car."
"She did," he replied. "But where was I going to find a fake one of those?"
After hearing about this rather extravagant gift, a friend of his said, "I thought she wanted a Mercedes sports car."
"She did," he replied. "But where was I going to find a fake one of those?"