Jokes About Christmas - Page 12

What do gorillas sing at Christmas?
Jungle Bells, Jungle Bells...

Joe: Did you get many Christmas presents?
Jack: I sure did. A lot more than my four brothers.
Joe: Why was that?
Jack: On Christmas morning I got up two hours before them.

What do you call Santa's helpers?
Subordinate Clauses.

I wish you a Merry Christmas
And a Happy New Year,
A stocking full of presents
And a fridge full of beer.

Christmas - a holiday during which neither the past nor the future is of as much interest as the present.

What do you get if you cross a cat with Father Christmas?
Santa Claws.

Who carries a sack and bites people?
Santa Jaws.

What did Santa get when he crossed a reindeer with a piece of wood?
A hat rack.

How does santa begin a joke?
"This one will sleigh you...."

Mummy, here's your Christmas present. A box of your favorite chocolates.
Thanks, but the box is half empty.
Well, they're my favorite chocolates too.