Cab drivers
Did you hear about the idiot who thought a taxidermist was someone who stuffs dead cab drivers?
Calendars
Why was the calendar sad?
Because its days were numbered.
Cakes
He's a few currents short of a fruit cake.
Calves
When I get old, will the calves on my legs be cows?
Calendars
Why did the calendar cross the road?
Because his days were numbered.
Calendars
Did you hear about the man who got sacked from the calendar factory because he took a day off?
Calculators
How does a cow solve math problems?
With a cowculator.
Calves
What did the little calf say to the silo?
'Is my fodder in there?
Calendars
Did you hear about the man who stole a calendar?
He was sentenced to 12 months in jail. They say his days are numbered.
Calculators
What do you get if you cross a dog and a calculator?
A friend you can always count on.