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Joke Topic - 'Zombies'

Here are 3 jokes on the topic - 'Zombies'.


What do you call a zombie who has a bell?
A dead ringer.

Why do zombies always look exhausted?
Because they are dead on their feet.

Why was the zombie awarded a medal?
Because he was dead-icated!

Here are some randomly selected joke topics



Fred: My girlfriend spends hours in front of the mirror admiring her beauty. Do you think that's vanity?
George: No, it's just imagination.


Paranoids are people, too they have their own problems.
It's easy to criticize, but if everybody hated you, you'd be paranoid too.

The Lottery

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Water who?
Water our chances of winning the lottery?


Waiter, waiter, what's in this stuff?'
'It's bean soup, sir.'
'I asked for its recipe, not its history.'


Joe: I was playing soccer yesterday and sprained my ankle. That's why I was absent from school this morning.
Teacher: What a lame excuse that is!


What do you call 2 scotsmen hanging from a washing line?
A pair of tights.


What do frogs like to drink when they are cold?
Hot croako.

King Arthur

Which of King Arthur's knights loved to eat steak?
Sir Loin.

Oliver Twist

Who wrote Oliver Twist?
How the dickens should I know?

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