Joke Topic - 'Won'

Here are 2 jokes on the topic - 'Won'.

Did you hear about the dog who went to college?
He won a collarship.

What do you call a rabbit that's just won the lottery?
A millionhare.

Here are some randomly selected joke topics

Work

I pretend to work. They pretend to pay me.

How did the little Scottie dog feel when he saw the Loch Ness monster?
Terrier-fied.

Threatening letters - man asks for long sentence

Why did the jeans burst into tears?
They felt blue.

Patient: Doctor, I feel like a car!
Doctor: Well, just park yourself over there.

Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Beats.
Beats who?
Beats me.

How is a bird sitting on a fence like a coin?
Because it has a head on one side and a tail on the other.

I went to the doctor, it was quite serious. He gave me 6 months to live. But when I couldn't pay his bill he gave me another 6 months.

You must must think I'm the perfect idiot.
No, you're not perfect.

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