One time an idiot was at a vending machine. He would stick a quarter in, push the button, a soda would come out and he would put it on top of the machine. He did this a few more times before a man asked why he kept doing this, and he said, "Because I'm winning."
Here are some randomly selected joke topics
Blondes
Q: Why did the blonde scale the glass wall?
A: To see what was on the other side.
How Are You
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Hiram.
Hiram who?
Hiram fine, how are you?
Madness
Madness takes its toll. Please have exact change.
Truck Driver
Why did the truck driver drive his truck off the cliff?
He wanted to try out the air brakes.
Man
What is the longest sentence known to man?
'I do.'
Apartments
Why are they called apartments, when they're all stuck together?
Ghosts
Where do baby ghosts go when their parents are
at work?
Day scare centers.
The Statue Of Liberty
Q. What does the Statue of Liberty stand for?
A. Because it can't sit down.
Letters
What did the letter say to the stamp?
You stick with me and together we'll go places.