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Joke Topic - 'Vampire'

Here are 4 jokes on the topic - 'Vampire'.


Did you hear what happened when the vampire met a beautiful woman?
It was love at first bite!

Doctor, doctor, I think I've been bitten by a vampire.
Drink this glass of water.
Will it make me better?
No, but I'll be able to see if your neck leaks.

What do you get if you cross a vampire with a hyena?
A animal that laughs at the sight of blood.

What do you get if you cross a vampire with some peanut butter?
A vampire that sticks to the roof of your mouth!

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Dogs and small children must be carried on the escalator
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Job Applicant: Have you got an opening for me?
Boss: Yes, and don't slam it on the way out.


What do you call a man who breaks into a meat factory?
A hamburglar.


Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder.


My new dog is very obedient. When I say 'heel' he always bites me on the heel.


Did you hear about the stonemason's son?
He was a chip off the old block.

Online Banking

Some people go online to their bank to get their balance. I just shake mine.


Newlywed Wife: I baked two kinds of biscuits today, dear. Would you like to take your pick?
Husband: No, thanks. I'll just use a hammer.


Q: Why don't blondes eat Jello?
A: They can't figure out how to get two cups of water into those little packets.

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