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Joke Topic - 'Umpires' - 3 Jokes and Funny Stories To Laugh At


Here are 3 jokes on the topic - 'Umpires'.

And why couldn't the loutish baseball umpire have his little boy sit in his lap?
Because the son never sits on the brutish umpire.
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What does a baseball player do when his eyesight starts going bad?
He gets a job as an umpire.
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When is a baseball umpire like a telephone operator?
When he makes a call?
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Here are some randomly selected joke topics

Eggs

Did you hear the one about the egg?
It's not all it's cracked up to be.
1>

Babies

What do baby outlaws like eating with their milk?
Crookies.
1>

Cats

What has four legs, whiskers, a tail, and flies?
A dead cat.
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Bad Ideas

Why is it a bad idea to iron a four-leaf clover?
Because you should never press your luck.
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Pigs

How does a pig write home?
With a pig pen.
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Mistakes

Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Jamaica.
Jamaica who?
Jamaica mistake?
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Mugged

How many New Yorkers does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Five - one to change the bulb and four to protect him from muggers.
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Ducks

What happens when ducks fly backward?
They quack up.
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Elephants

Why don't elephants like penguins?
They can't get the wrapper off. (To whom it may concern: Penguins are a brand of cookies).
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