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Joke Topic - 'Umpire'


Here are 3 jokes on the topic - 'Umpire'.

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And why couldn't the loutish baseball umpire have his little boy sit in his lap?
Because the son never sits on the brutish umpire.
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What does a baseball player do when his eyesight starts going bad?
He gets a job as an umpire.
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When is an baseball umpire like a telephone operator?
When he makes a call.


Here are some randomly selected joke topics

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Christmas

What is the difference between the Christmas alphabet and the normal alphabet?
The Christmas alphabet has Noel.
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Labor

Heavy labor is aardvark ... but it pays well
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Holidays

What is grey, has four legs and a trunk?
A mouse going on holiday.
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American

Where do American cows live?
In Moo York.
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Crash

NERVOUS PASSENGER: How often do planes of this type crash?
CAPTAIN: Only once, Madam.
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Wife

Bill gave his wife a real surprise on her birthday. He remembered it.
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Grandchildren

Do you have any grandchildren?
No, all my children are just ordinary.
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Haunted

What should a gymnast do if he finds himself in a haunted house?
Exorcise.
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Plumber

What did the plumber say to his girlfriend called Flo when he wanted to find a new girlfriend?
It's all over Flo.

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