At the grocery shop, a woman was searching through the frozen turkeys, but she was unable to find a turkey that was large enough for her family.
She asked a stock boy, 'Do these turkeys get any bigger?'
the stock boy replied, 'No, ma'am, they're dead.'
Mum, can I please have a dog for Christmas?
No, you will have turkey like everyone else!
Who is never hungry on Christmas Day?
The turkey - it's always stuffed.
Why did the police arrest the turkey?
They suspected it of foul play.
Horses
What is black and white and turns cartwheels?
A piebald horse pulling a cart.
Bugs
Bugs are Sons of Glitches!
Teachers
In school, I was the teacher's pet.
She couldn't afford a dog.
Soccer
What do you get if you cross a football team with a bunch of crazy jokers?
Mad jester united.
Economists
Why did God create economists?
To make weather forecasters look good.
Cows
What do cows like to do for entertainment?
Watch moovies!
Witches
Which witch is good at cricket?
The Wicket Witch of the North.
Dogs
My brother said, 'Mum, I feel sick as a dog.'
My mum said, 'Hang on, I'll call the vet.'
Pigs
Why is ink like a pig?
They both can be found in a pen.