Football
Where do footballers dance?
At a football.
Astronauts
Where did the astronaut get his degree?
At the mooniversity!
Blondes
Why was the blonde staring at the can of frozen orange juice?
Because it said concentrate.
Robbery
What do you call a Teletubby who's been robbed?
A tubby
Songs
How many folk singers does it take to change a light bulb?
Six - one to do all the work and five to write a song about how good the old one was.
Chickens
Why did the chicken cross the road?
Too long to go around.
Dracula
Did you hear about the man who kept thinking he was Dracula?
He was a right pain in the neck.
Squirrels
Why do squirrels always 'live happily ever afterward'?
Because they have furry tail ends.
Ducks
What do you call a box of ducklings?
A box of quackers.