Joke Topic - 'River'

What kind of ghost haunts tall buildings?
High spirits!

A born loser: Somebody who calls the telephone number that's scrawled in lipstick on the phone booth wall -- and his wife answers.

Why do vampires never get fat?
They eat necks to nothing.

Chef Throws His Heart Into Helping Feed The Needy

What do you get if you cross Father Christmas and a flying saucer?
A UF ho ho ho!

Why is ink like a pig?
They both can be found in a pen.

Q: Why are elephants large, grey and wrinkled?
A: Because if they were small, white and smooth they'd be asprins.

What do you call a cat with eight legs that likes to go swimming?
An octopuss.

What famous 60's song did Charles Dickens write?
Oliver Twist.