A man walks into a pub and sees Vincent Van Gogh standing at the bar. The man says 'I love your paintings, can I buy you a drink?'
Vincent replies, 'No thanks I've got one ear.'
Here are some randomly selected joke topics
Cats
Why did the cat move to a new neighborhood?
Because the old one had gone to the dogs!
Lawyers
Lawyer Says His Client Is Not That Guilty
Possessed
"You have reached 555-5678, DIAL-A-DEMON. At the sound of the tone you will be possessed."
King Arthur
Why did King Author wear his Cloak to the Great Ball, rather than his Mantle?
Cause kings go better with cloak!
Boss
Rules:
(1) The boss is always right.
(2) When the boss is wrong, refer to rule 1.
Student
Your child may be an honor student but you're still an idiot.
Apples
How do you make an apple puff?
You chase it around the kitchen.
Donkeys
How do you get five donkeys on a fire engine?
Two in the front, two in the back, and one on the roof going EE-AW-EE-AW.
Business
Knock knock.
Who's there?
It's Nana.
It's Nana who?
It's Nana your business.