George: Mum, can I go and play in the park?
Mother: With those old jeans and t-shirt?
George: No, with my friends who live across the road.
Here are some randomly selected joke topics
Perfect
You must must think I'm the perfect idiot.
No, you're not perfect.
Noses
When they were handing out noses, you thought that they said roses and so you asked for a big red one.
Remember
I can't remember if I used to be forgetful or not
Bees
What kind of bees live in a graveyard?
Zombees.
Difficult
Why be difficult, when with a little bit more effort you can be completely impossible?
Christmas
Who hides in the bakery at Christmas?
A mince spy.
Diplomacy
Diplomacy is the art of saying "nice doggy" until you can find a rock.
Driving
Why am I the only person on earth that knows how to drive?
Lawyers
Lawyer Says His Client Is Not That Guilty