Joke Topic - 'Parties'

Why do vampires try to avoid getting into arguments?
Because they make themselves cross.

Two men play five games of checkers. Each man wins the same number of games. There are not ties. Explain this.
they are not playing each other.

MABEL: When I'm old and ugly, will you still love me?
PERCY: I do, don't I?

Last night I told my girlfriend that I would go to the end of the world for her, and she said, "Yes but would you stay there?"

Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Ima.
Ima who?
Ima gonna break down this door if you don't open it!

Did you hear that the local food factory is not going to make sausages any longer?
They're long enough already.

What's black and brown and looks good on a lawyer?
A doberman.

What should you say if you meet a toad?
Wart's new?

How many real men does it take to screw in a light bulb?
None. Real men aren't afraid of the dark.