Joke Topic - 'Pampered'

There are two things I dislike in a person -
Absentmindedness and... I can't remember the other one.

Why was the dog arrested?
He forgot to pay his barking ticket.

Where do policemen live?
999 Letsbe Avenue.

Why is the alphabet in that order? Is it because of that song?

Why did the chicken cross the road??
Too long to go around.....

Silence isn't always golden, sometimes it's guilt!

Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Don.
Don who?
Don take me for granted.

Santa's elves are just a bunch of subordinate Clauses.

What do you call a man whose wife has just divorced him?
A divorce-he.