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Joke Topic - 'Paint'

Here are 4 jokes on the topic - 'Paint'.


A decorator was painting a house and the owner came home to find the man rushing about like a mad thing with his brushes.
'Why are you working so fast?' he asked.
'Well, you see, sir, the paint's running low and I want to finish the job before it's all gone.'

An idiot was given the job of painting white lines down the middle of a road. On his first day he painted eight miles, on his second day he painted 3 miles, and on his third day he painted just one mile. The boss was not pleased. He asked him, "Why is it that you are painting less each day?"
"Because each day I get further away from the can of paint."

I'd give my right ear to paint like Van Gogh

What kind of coat is put on when it is wet?
A coat of paint.

Here are some randomly selected joke topics



What food did the cannibal order as his take-away?
Pizza with everyone on it.


I'm having to leave my wife because of another woman - her mother.


What did the cannibal say when he was full up?
I couldn't eat another mortal.


What do you get if you cross an aeroplane with a Cornish pasty?
Pie in the sky.


Why did Dracula's wife leave him?
Because he was a pain in the neck.


"And this is the sound the aliens made..." (BEEP!)


Which vampire likes to eat junk food?


When cheese gets its picture taken, what does it say?


How do you post a rabbit?
By hare mail.

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