Q: How does a male octopus ask a female octopus to marry him?
A: Can I have your hand, your hand, your hand, your hand ...
Here are some randomly selected joke topics
A Bakery
Why did the lazy man apply for a job in a bakery?
So he could just loaf around all day.
A Bad Company
If you think we're a bad company, you should see the competition.
Idiot
Watch out for the idiot behind me.
Rabbits
Why do rabbits have shiny noses?
Because their powder puffs are at the wrong end!
Girlfriends
What did the artist say to his girlfriend?
"I love you with all my art."
Doctors
My mum said, 'Doctor, give me something for my kidneys.'
The doctor said, 'How about a few rashers of bacon?'
Insects
What did one insect say to the other?
Stop bugging me.
Birthdays
Bill: Today is my wife's birthday.
Phil: What are you getting for her?
Bill: Make me an offer!
Mouse
When should a mouse carry an umbrella?
When it's raining cats and dogs.