Joke Topic - 'Not Here'

Doctor, Doctor, everyone keeps ignoring me.
Next, please.

Why did the shellfish go to the gym?
To build up it's mussels.

Why is it not difficult to swindle sheep out of their money?
Because it is easy to pull the wool over their eyes.

'Hi Bob, Where have you been?'
'The cemetery.'
'Oh! Who's dead?'
'They all are.'

Computer programmers never die, they just get lost in the processing.

Q: Why do blondes to drive BMWs?
A: Because they can spell it.

If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.

What do you call a bee which is born in the month of May?
A maybee.

Their marriage is based on trust and understanding.
She doesn't trust him, and he can't understand her.