Joke Topic - 'Noise Pollution'

When delivering the presents how many chimneys does Father Christmas go down?
Stacks of them.

What is big, grey and far too dangerous to appear in a circus?
An elephant with a machine gun.

Why was it impossible to put Humpty Dumpty together again?
Because he wasn't all that he was cracked up to be.

When is a man like a dog?
When he is a boxer.

What do you call it when a cow is spying on another cow?
A steak out.

Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Money.
Money who?
Money is stiff, I hurt it playing football.

'Are you married?'
'No, I've always been round-shouldered.'

How do rabbits stay cool in the summer?
They have air conditioning.

Why did the clown wear loud socks?
So that his feet wouldn't fall asleep.