Joke Topic - 'Nice'

Where there's a will there's a relative

My brother said, 'l've brought you home a present. It's a wombat.'
I said, 'What's a wombat for?'
He said, 'A good game of wom.'

What type of vegetables do plumbers fix?
Leeks.

How do you murder a blonde?
Put spikes on her shoulder pads.

"And what will you do when you grow up to be as big as me?" asked the father of his little son.
"Diet."

Where can you dance in California?
San Frandisco.

How many paranoids does it take to change a lightbulb?
Who wants to know?

What do you call a sleeping bull?
A bulldozer.

Why is your cat so small?
He only drinks condensed milk.