A man was caught for speeding and went before the judge. The judge
said, "What will you take: 30 days or $30?"
The man thought and replied, "I think I'll take the money."
Accountant - someone you hire to explain that you didn't make the money you did.
Are you interested in making $$$$ fast? Here's an incredibly simple way to do it and there is nothing to buy, no investment to make, no money to lose!
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Follow this simple procedure:
1. Open a new text or word document
2. Hold down the shift key.
3. Hit the 4 key four times.
Did you hear about the a fish that wanted to borrow some money?
He went to visit the loan shark.
Did you hear what happened to the man who invested all his money in a company who made erasers?
When the company went bankrupt, he was wiped out.
Don't marry for money...You can borrow it cheaper.
Highway man to traveller: Your money or your life!
Traveller: Take my life, I'm saving up.
How do you know if a Scotsman is left-handed?
He keeps all his money in his right-hand pocket.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Jimmy.
Jimmy who?
Jimmy all your money.
My brother said, 'I'm going to become a forger. I'm going to make some big money.'
I said, 'Don't make it too big or someone'll notice.'