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Joke Topic - 'Landlady'

Here are 3 jokes on the topic - 'Landlady'.


'Excuse me,' said the guest, 'but this steak is so tough I can't even cut it. Take it away and bring me another.'
'I can't take it away,' said the landlady. 'You've bent it.'

A holidaymaker was complaining to his landlady about his room. 'Look. This wall's so thin you can almost see through it.'
'That's not a wall,' she replied, 'it's the window.'

A man arrived at his holiday guest-house and met the landlady.
'Can you sing?' she snapped.
'No,' he replied.
'Well, you'd better learn quickly. There's no lock on the bathroom door.'

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What did Cinderella Dolphin wear to the ball?
Glass flippers.


Some people have a chip on their shoulder.
He has a whole lumberyard.


What type of restaurants are vampires careful to avoid?


How many Princeton students does it take to change a light bulb?
Two, one to mix the martinis and one to call the electrician.


We're sorry. You have reached an imaginary number. Please rotate your phone 90 degrees and try again.


Why is it if you send a package by Ship it is called Cargo, and if you send it by Car it is called a Shipment?


A politician is a man who stands for what he thinks the voters will fall for.


Calling you stupid would be an insult to stupid people.


In school I was the teacher's pet.
She couldn't afford a dog.

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