Joke Topic - 'Kermit'

What type of car is like a sausage?
An old banger.

You can tune a piano, but you can't tuna fish.

Robber: Your Honor. I'm sorry for breaking into the Italian restaurant.
Judge: Thirty days for disturbing the pizza.

Old doughnut makers never die, they just get tired of the whole business.

Patient: Doctor, doctor, I have a hoarse throat.
Doctor: Believe me, the resemblance doesn't end there.

I want to buy a truckload of goose feathers, but I can't afford the down payment.

Q: How does an elephant get down from a tree?
A: It doesn't, You get down from a duck.

I'm not as dumb as you look.

What did the frog order when he went to McDonald's?
A hoppy meal.