Joke Topic - 'Kennel Club'

Did you hear about the pilot who went on sick leave?
He came down with the flu.

Where would you be most likely to find a prehistoric cow?
In a moo-seum.

Patient: Doctor, my stomach hurts!
Doctor: Oh stop bellyaching!

What do cannibals eat for breakfast?
Buttered host.

What did the mother cow say to the baby cow?
You should be asleep by now, it's way pasture bedtime.

What do you call a train that is carrying toffee?
A chew chew train.

"I'm not under the alkafluence of inkahol that some thinkle peep I am.
It's just the drunker I sit here the longer I get."

A Truck load of prunes has been stolen. Police are looking for a man on the run.

Golfer: Do you notice any improvement since last year?
Caddy: Yes sir, you've bought a new golf bag.