An extremely jealous wife gave her husband a careful inspection every evening when he arrived home. Even the smallest hair found on his jacket would lead to violent
recriminations. One night, after finding nothing at all, she burst into tears and exclaimed, "Even bald women now!"
Here are some randomly selected joke topics
School Teacher
Did you hear about the school teacher who married a dairymaid?
It didn't last. They were like chalk and cheese.
Cannibals
First cannibal: What are you cooking for dinner?
Second cannibal: Shut up and get back in the oven.
Good Luck
What do you get when you cross poison ivy with 4 leaf clovers?
A rash of good luck!
Martians
Why are Martians green?
They forgot to take their travel sickness tablets before leaving Mars.
Teachers
Teacher: I wish you’d pay a little attention to what I'm saying!
Pupil: I'm paying as little as I can!
Doggie Bags
Customer: Why don't you have doggie bags?
Waiter: That would be considered cruelty to animals.
Nothing
Knock knock
Who's there?
Scott
Scott who?
Scott nothing to do with you.
Trousers
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Dakota.
Dakota who?
Dakota fits perfectly, but the trousers are too long.
Computers
I haven't lost my mind it's backed up on tape somewhere.